Despite being raised in a very Christian home (pretty much the church basement) I am only beginning to understand my spirituality. And how it has nothing to do with religion.
Today, under a new moon and with intention, I let go of the things I needed. I wrote them down, took it to the beach and made a tiny fire to burn them away. After that, I allowed the ocean to wash over my bare feet. And I gave back to the universe any negative energy that I had accepted.
I came home and took Psilocybin. I have done that in the past for fun but today it was with intention. That isn’t as much ‘fun’, but it is way better!
(Sorry if I come across like a hippie when I say…. the earth will provide you with ways to heal.More like a pagan, than a hippie, actually.)
I won’t lie, I spent the good portion of two hours sobbing under a blanket on my couch. And my music ran out on the computer. I kept trying to get out from under my blanket to get my music back. But? I couldn’t. Too much light. Too cold. All reasons to go back under my blanket. And every time I returned without music it was because there was another truth to face. Under the safety of my blanket I was forced to be in silence (because I wasn’t able in the moment) and face all my demons. And I sobbed. I eventually begged for music.
Haven’t I learned enough for one day? I can’t take anymore. Fucking gods let me dance. Please.
I found my way out of the blanket, music playing, dancing! Not an easy day of new things but feeling like I am a better version of myself for the entire day!