My Rebellions

Am I a rebel? Some people in my life might categorize me that way. I have a brother who does for sure. He called me a danger to society and told me I will never know his children. Maybe some of the people in my childhood think of me as rebellious for converting to paganism.

I think of myself as a quiet rebel. “Always in compliance, even in defiance!”

My first ‘rebellion’? I was about twelve years old. We had to wear skirts to school and other friends of mine wore nylons while I was made to wear leotards still. So I approached my parents. I sat them down and presented my case in a formal fashion. They told me they would take it under advisement. They came back with a compromise. I wore leotards because they didn’t get ruined as easy. We were poor.They would pay for one pair of nylons a week and if they got ruined I would wear leotards or find a way to but my own nylons. AGREED!! I won.

I learned very early if you present your situation well and are reasonable about what you want? You can make change!

So, coupled with that aggressive attitude I had naturally? Came the way I was brought up in church. Obedience. I sometimes still hum this sick song that goes:

Obedience is the very best way

To show that you believe!

Doing exactly what the Lord commands

Doing it naturally


Obedience is the very best way

To show that you believe!


Children in the old testament got stoned for disobedience. I was kinda terrified of disobeying. And when I did? My dad only had to glance at me with anger and I would break down. I wasn’t scared of punishment, I was sincerely upset with myself for disobeying. I’m way more of a rule obeyer than a rule breaker.

Okay, considering some things in my past that statement is up for debate. Ha ha!

I rebel in my own ways!

I married an immigrant to keep him in the country because I disagreed with the laws at the time. I moved into the heart of the forest to try and protect it from an oil pipeline and ended up arrested for it. I’ve protested a lot of controversial issues – like CFS stealing children. I thought my city’s Food Bank was failing people so I started another one. Just went door to door and asked people for food, then gave it to people who needed it. Some NDP politician called me a communist for doing that without government approval and I got shut down.

So, yeah, I rebel.

But I also face my consequences! I went through court about the forest stuff. I walked away with a fine and no criminal record. I stood up to that politician for 6 months before he shut me down with my food help. I faced every consequence of my high school rebellions. My immigrant ex husband and his wife now live in this country and why? Because even when I rebel it’s with a heart that can defend it. If I rebel? It’s because I believe in something enough to face the consequences!

I have fight in my spirit today. I haven’t felt that feeling in a long time. I need to use it in a more productive fashion than being in fight mode. So, here I am writing about feeling rebellious. And I have dance music on. I’m trying to chair dance while I type and dance some less fight into my soul.

What can I find today to gently rebel against?


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