I don’t have a lot of local friends. Some I call acquaintances. But so many have hurt me or mine at this point that I don’t have a lot of care for them.
I have one friend on the island that I know I can count on. That kind you can call 24/7 and know they have your back? I have one. Bury the body style? This person is my friend.
My ex was jealous because of my own past indiscretions AND his inability to forgive. I understand. But I still needed a friend. You don’t give up the ‘I’ll go to the grave for you’ kinda friend. (My friend would hate I say this ’cause he’s a guy, but, like a sister)
I don’t make friends quickly or easily with women. However when I do find a woman I can connect with as a friend (not just lust) I hold hard. It’s hard for me. And when I live in a trailer park? Kinda hard to find what I am looking for in a sister.
I mean, no judgement is intended there because I live in a trailer park, too. Just saying it’s probably not going to be where I find the quality of friends who will help me move forward. That’s just my most recent experiences are telling me.
One of my efforts to show my ex I was trying to make other friends was to make a Facebook event on a local group and invite women for a Ladies Night. Oh yeah. Anxiety ridden me? I invited the general public to my home so I could prove to him I don’t just want man friends.
He was gone the next day.
And now I have this event that other women got excited about. One I am inclined to cancel because, really, the timing? But also inclined to keep because, really, the timing?
I decided not to cancel. I have also decided I don’t care if anyone shows up. If anyone who has said they will show does? It’s because I need a sister friend right now and they were probably meant to be it.
I can’t believe I am NOT cancelling this.
allhoursblog 
Alright big homie i need to know that your followers are like your biggest fans. They like what you do and they are not local so you are on the right path. Now trailer park i dont know much about that environment and i really dont about it. There is a reason why i am saying this. You can change your environment mentally, when i say this it is the fact if you want to be around different kinds of people you have to change what you want mentally. I do know it is not easy for some and even harder for others. Finding likeminded people is easier then you think you have to look big homie.
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Enabling is a whole other discussion unrelated to my search for friends. Alcoholism? Also not the subject.
However, regardless of the truth about jealousy or alcoholism? I was accused of cheating with the only friend who actually cares about me. I was called a slut and a whore. I was told I am a narcissistic, selfish cunt because of who I spent my time with.
Not just accused in person (although that is bad enough) but he put it online. And in public groups. Other people saw it and reacted. I lost online friends over it.
He put it on Facebook so any mutual friend could see his anger and false accusations. So they know I am a lying, cheating, selfish cunt.
He made me feel like nothing.
It’s not okay. And destroying me out of anger (online) while I defend him so he can keep his job (online)? Is fucking with my mind.
Every time he messages me? I ask him to stop. I want it to stop. I want this all to be so done…..
To get back to what you were saying? Admittedly? I don’t make the most wise decisions whether drunk or sober. Also NOT relevant to this post.
It’s just a post for me to find female friends. What bring my past bad decision into it?
Thank you for saying it is a ‘great post’ but I* have a feeling you are NOT a friend.
Whomever you are? I respectfully ask you not reply to my blog anymore.
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